Woman Wants Ex to Suffer

Dear Ruth,

I have a friend who is going through a very nasty divorce. Within 3 weeks of moving out she found out she had to have major surgery. She is having a very rough time.

She does an "exercise" that she believes channels all her struggles and anger to him so that he "suffers" like she does. She says she visualizes herself breathing in peace then blowing out all her suffering into his conscious mind.

I don't think this is helping her at all, it keeps her from healing.

What do you think and how can I help her let go?

Worried Friend

Dear Worried Friend,

You are absolutely right!

Whenever a person sends hate, all the hate goes through the sender first, causing her to suffer more.

Sending anger this way may not cause the target person any harm, but will definitely cause the sender more problems.

The best way to get even is to show your ex-husband how happy and successful you are without him.

Instead of wasting time and energy injuring herself, I recommend your friend begin living a positive thinking life, with healthy friends.

Meditation and visualization will help her begin the healing process.

Free Psychic Readings?

Dear Ruth,

A coworker shared with me how beneficial it was for her getting help from a psychic guide after hearing me complain constantly about my money and social life problems. Because of financial problems that I’ve been having for a while, I decided to give it a try and searched the web for free readings.

I am new to this phenomena and was looking forward to informative responses. Instead I was told that my life indeed should be better but it is not because of negative energy, black cloud, and one even said that I was cursed. This all just frustrated me. I realized now how naïve for me to think that someone would share valid information for free.

I am reading self help books and feel that I am making progress in my life, but I also feel a little confused about my ordeal. I would like to ask you if you could recommend a spiritual medium that you trust that I can see for advice here in Chicago. By the way, I came across your name from an article. Thank you very much for your time.

Frustrated

Dear Frustrated,

Go to my website www.ruthberger.com and check to see if you feel good about contacting me. I am in Chicago, but only do phone readings.

Put your psychic ability to work and trust your gut instincts.

Help! My Friend Wants to Kill Herself

Dear Ruth,

I am worried about my friend. I call her many times a day fearing she's taken her life. I keep trying to come up with new ideas to solve her problem, but all she wants to talk about is how unhappy she is, and how she wishes her life was over.

When she doesn't use my ideas, I get discouraged and drained. I'm getting just like her, dwelling on her problems is overwhelming to my family and me. I think she needs a therapist, but she refuses to see one. What should I do?

Overwhelmed

Dear Overwhelmed,

You are a caring, empathic woman, who is taking on the emotions of your friend. The more you listen to her, the less confidence you have. She has a problem that only she can fix. She needs professional help on a psychological level. You are not a therapist and that’s what she needs.

Only she can save herself and all you’re doing is giving her the opportunity to dwell on her fears. It’s time to severe the tie.

Think of her as a small child (6) who has awakened from a nightmare. You’re trying to save her from drowning, but neither of you knows how to swim in such deep water. If she doesn’t want to get help, give her the phone number of a suicide hot line. They’re more trained than you are to talk about suicide prevention.

Be strong and take charge of your thinking.

Open Again to Spirits

Hello Ruth,

Reading your book has lifted my mood, and given me some hope in trying to contact spirit again, and to really thank you for writing your book.

I look for books for me to develop again Spiritually, My Nan was always going to Spiritual Church, but never developed herself, and my Mother went to a closed circle to develop, so I've been brought up always to believe there is life after life.

I started to develop when i was around 20 years old, and made friends with a women at the closed circle i used to go to and we would practice and go to sites and practice tarot acts. Then when I was around 24 years old I stopped.

Im now 34 years old, and feel pulled into wanting to be in contact with spirit again, I have no family as such, no brothers and sisters and have had a lot of life changing events happen to me over the last 3 years, and I am looking for the warmth and confidence I used to receive when I was developing in my 20's with spirit.

I've been looking for books for me to do it myself, and I have contacted a women in the local paper to go to a closed circle to develop again, that will start in this month.

Open Again

Dear Open Again,

I am delighted that you are returning to a higher level of study. Often this happens after people feel alone and lost. Meditation in a healthy group of women gives great solace and understanding of the past and present.

My prayers go with you.

Father's Face in Dreams Precedes Crisis

Dear Ruth,

Whenever I dream of my deceased father, something terrible happens within a few days.

I've grown fearful of seeing him in my dreams.

I will always love my father, but I don't want him to scare me any more.

Can you help me?

Loving Daughter

Dear Loving Daughter,

My hunch is that your father is trying to prepare you for what is about to happen, but neither you nor he knows how to do this.

The next time you have a scary dream with your father, ask him, "Why are you in my dream?"

Trust that you will hear the answer in your mind. Know that he loves you very much.

Then ask him, "Why me?"

Lastly ask him, "What do you want me to do?"

The answer will come through your thoughts.

When you hear the answer, sit quietly for a minute or two to contemplate if this is something you can do. If it is, do it as soon as possible.

If it is something you feel you cannot do, turn the request over to a higher power.

For example: "Dear God. I can't do what my father asks, but you can. Thank you."

Then trust and let go of your fears.

You have the beginnings of a medium and can do a lot of good.

Bless you.

How Can I Tell If Someone Is Taking Drugs

Dear Ruth,

I moved to the United States a few years ago from a small village in Europe. I am terrified that my 13 year-old-son will get involved with the wrong friends and use drugs.

What can I do to prevent this from happening? Recently he said that he is going out with friends from school that I've never met.

How will I know if his friends are good for him or taking drugs?

Worried Mother

Dear Worried Mother,

Ask your son to tell you the names of this friends, one at a time.

If your body gets a sick feeling when you hear a name, your intuition is telling you to be alert.

Listen for another name and note if your body feels worse or better.

Each time you hear a name, the worse you feel, the more likely the person with the name, will not be the type of boy you want your son to be friends with. Pay attention and take courage. Invite the boy over and listen to him.

The more you practice the above exercise, the more you will know who to trust and who not to trust.

Send me your results.

How Can I Stop Getting Burned Out?

Dear Ruth, Two good friends have lost a family member and are suffering from guilt, and depression. I am getting burned out listening while trying to help them.

Should I surround myself with the the white light to protect me?

What can I do to stop taking on their emotional pains?

Burned Out

Dear Burned Out,

You're trying to hard to solve their problems. All that does is make you feel helpless.

Your friends are hurting. Love them, pray for them, but don't become like them. If you do you'll get sucked up by their negative energies.

There are underlying reasons for grief and pain. Good listening will help you get past what they say and often they'll tell you what they need to do.

When they say something that sounds right, encourage them.

The world is going through a terrible change. We are all a part of this change.

Surround yourself with positive affirmations to stay afloat.

Blessings.

Bullies

Dear Ruth,

I have a perpetual problem with vicious people anywhere I happen to work. I can't keep a job because of it and I'm convinced there's something in my makeup that either creates or attracts it. I am a very kind person, understand when people need listening to or are upset, so I don't understand why I end up working with people who could be considered sociopathic.

They don't seem to care about others and are utterly cruel to others, and I for some reason perpetually end up working right next to them. It's not that my co-worker is having a bad day. That I would understand and empathize. I end up having to leave each job, only to go to another job where it is again.

I've now lost four important jobs for the same reason. I'm frightened and don't know what to do. Can you advise me?

Lost

Dear Lost,

My hunch is that your psychic scanner is always open to the energies of others. You're like a surgeon who can't stop operating.

Going to another place of employment doesn't lessen or solve the problem. It is necessary for you to understand that you are letting the negative thoughts of others consume you.

Before going to work in the morning, surround yourself with mental sunlight, and expand it to cover you and the people in your workplace.

Every time you allow yourself to get infected with their negative vibrations, go to the bathroom, wash your hands to cleanse their energies, and return to the mental image of sunlight surrounding you.

Generally this sunlight seeing works fast, but you must control your thoughts, to make this work instantly.

Let me know your results.

To Be Intuitive or Not To Be

Dear Ruth,

I am an 18-year-old girl who wants to know how my deceased grandmother is. She used to tell me about her dreams, seeing angles and speaking with them. The morning we found her unconscious in her bed, all her legal papers were laid out on her dresser signed and ready to go, as if she knew something was going to happen. I realize all of this may be chalked up to coincidence or irony, but things progressed from there.

When my grandmother was placed into a nursing home, my parents sold her home and we moved to another house and set up a bedroom to look exactly like her old bedroom. She came home and passed away soon after. I lived in her bedroom for the next three years, and developed severe depression and anxiety with no real cause. I was treated with medications and still no relief. It got worse and worse to the point where I attempted suicide, twice.

Since I moved, all my suicidal feelings have been relinquished. My dad thinks there may have been negative energy in the house related to my grandmother’s furnishings, and purchased some dried white sage, and said to light the end on fire and let the smoke surround the room and it will rid the place of evil spirits. It seems different, but not much.

I want to be intuitive and if I have this gift, I don't want it to go to waste.

Granddaughter

Dear Granddaughter,

You wanted to sleep in your grandmother's bedroom, so you could be close to a woman who loved you very much. She was very frightened of her psychic gifts, and you have absorbed her fears. You need to balance your emotional and spiritual connection, less you draw more negative energies to you.

First you need healing training to rectify the harm that has caused you to have emotional problems, and to develop your psychic connection with God.

Reading books such as:

Prayer, Faith and Healing: Cure Your body, Heal Your Mind and Restore Your Soul, by Kenneth Winston Caine, Brian Paul and Bernie S. Siegel, and
Healing with Spirit by Caroline Myss will help you develop your intuitive talents.

With patience and time, you will become a wise healing psychic.

Where is My Off Button?

Dear Off,

I signed up on your website and read your blog. I did not see where I could find the "off button" for my psychic ability.

It's all been so unpleasant, frustrating and confusing that if someone could actually tell me where the off button is, I would gladly press it once and for all. It's always about negative upcoming events, never once have the messages had any nice tips for me. I never once saw anything nice coming my way.

I still would like to know why this happens to me, but if an expedited means of turning it all off is available, I would skip the rest and go there. If you could direct me to a book, a chapter, a direction or anything else that that would answer any of this, I would be greatly obliged.

Turn Me Off

Dear Turn Me Off,

Your psychic gifts are like a runaway train. There is a reason you are getting these messages. You have been chosen to help someone.

Instead of trying to turn them off, believe you can direct them to come to you at a certain time, 10AM/PM or another time that you can pay attention to the messages when you are fully rested. Then ask why you have been selected to deliver this message.

Secondly, when you get a message, surround yourself with the white light of the Universe, so you can see the whole picture, not just the dark part.

I have learned that every time a person goes through a dark tunnel, there is a reason. Once you find out the reason, you will be able to turn off. Ask for the answer when the message first comes through. Take charge.

My book, They Don't See What I See, explains how to see and understand more.

Stay or Go With My Lying Husband

Dear Ruth,

I have a strong intuition because I feel things and somewhat just know. However with my husband, it's like a swarm of insecurities and ups and downs trying to trust him. We married before knowing each other for long and our rocky marriage bothers me.

My whole life feels as if it has been a gamble. I love my husband, but his lies hurt me too much. I need to know if it's okay for me to let go of our rocky start and allow a new beginning to happen.

Stay or Go

Dear Stay or Go,

My first hunch is that you are way too insecure and are staying with your husband because you keep waiting for something, anything to change except you. It's time for you to learn how to know when your husband is lying.

Your husband loves to lie about opportunities because he truly wants to take the easy road. If while he is telling you about another BIG opportunity, notice if your head or body hurts. Stop listening and just pay attention if he's getting more animated, louder, and touches you more. Then think: is he making sense or is he just trying to convince himself?

It's time to utilize your intuition in a healthier way. Think like someone you admire. What would he or she do? Then do it.

Trust your instincts.

Why Doesn't My Mother Visit Me?

Dear Ruth,

My mother has been gone for two years. During the past few days, my siblings are getting visits from her but she doesn't come to me.

I used to see my mother's ghost at night, and during the day I would her voice telling how much she loved me. I wonder if my sister-in-law is seeing my mother now because she’s more spiritually evolved than I am. I’m jealous because she’s not with me. Why is she ignoring me?
Jealous

Dear Jealous,

My hunch is your mother was caring, loving woman. She goes where’s she’s needed. You don’t need her right now, but your siblings do. Your sister-in- law isn’t more spiritually evolved than you, just is more open to seeing her. You're blocking your mother from talking to you with your envy.

Ask your mother to come and she will.

My Grandson's energy is hurting me

Dear Ruth,

I worry so much about my bipolar grandson. He is often hospitalized for his malady and his parents don't know what to do with him any more. I get sick just thinking about him. I am not a healthy woman, and thinking about my grandson makes my blood pressure higher.

What can I do to feel better?

Grandmother


Dear Grandmother,

My hunch is the love for your grandson is allowing him to invade your aura/energy field. He doesn't know this, but whenever he is having a mental crisis, he knows you will do whatever you can to help him, so he thinks about you, possibly even sees you in his mind. You, in turn, take on his pain.

Trust that a higher power can take over. End your prayers with, "I let go and let God take over the care of my grandson now." These thoughts will go to your grandson and both of you will feel better.

Meditating Alone

Dear Ruth,

Whenever I try to meditate alone, my mind gets busy thinking about what I have to do. When I’m with a group, I have no trouble meditating. My mind stops worrying about my family and friends. Meditating in groups calms me down. How can I stop my mind for wandering when I try to meditate on my own?

The Wanderer


Dear Wanderer,

Fear is the number one obstacle of meditating alone. Are you fearful of encountering something you can’t handle, or that you might get a message too powerful for you to handle?

Walk around your home and notice where you feel calm, better, happier. Sit on the floor, on a chair, or lie in bed and do breathing exercises.

Instead of trying not to feel, think about a nature spot that fills you with radiance; trees, water, sky, etc. Become the nature spot by asking questions: what does it feel like to be a tree? Soon the tree will fade from your mind and you’ll be meditating.

Recommended reading: Meditations from Conversations with God, Book 2 by Neale Donald Walsch.

Why Do I Get Half Messages?

Dear Ruth,

I am searching for someone who can help me to figure out WHY since I was a teen-ager, I have been receiving "messages" that merely let me know something is not right, danger is on the horizon, and other such "half-messages.". A few of these have been a bit more accurate than I am reflecting, but these messages are so half-way that they are down-right frustrating!!

Everyone who knows me well, says I'm aware of many things ahead of time, but no one can tell me why.

Frankly, the way I get this stuff, I would just as soon be left out of it and find out like everyone else - when it actually happens. It's kind of like a gnat buzzing around one's head, on the annoyance factor.

Halfway

Dear Halfway,

You are only getting half the message because you didn't know how to be quiet to ask the right questions.

Why are you the one that is getting the message?
What do you need to know about this half message?
What are you supposed to do with the information.

Then listen and learn what to do next. You may be surprised that the information isn't scary any more, just informative.

I'll be interested to know your results.

New Business location - yes or no?

Dear Ruth,

I am in the process of a major decision right now. With the housing market being so flat right now an ordinary choice has become a bit tricky. I have found a house that would be ideal for my Tai Chi business and give our family more living space. It is very unique and I feel it is being put in my space to enable me to help more people while being more present to my family.

Tricky part - Our house is listed but not sold. The question is will my house sell quick enough so we do not get stuck with two mortgages if we go ahead and purchase the other house?

I am having a difficult time getting neutral enough to be intuitive. Can you give me any insight?

Not Neutral Enough

Dear Not Neutral Enough,

My common sense is for you to wait, but my intuition says you have another choice.

You are not the only one being stymied by the real estate market. Perhaps the present owner of the house you desire would be willing to rent his place to you, with the idea of some of the rent being put to the purchase when you sell your present home.

Intuitively I 'see' you not selling your home for many months - too long to be paying two mortgages. So if the seller isn't willing to go with the rental idea, don't do anything right now.

2008 will be a better year for you. Be patient.

Auras of the Presidential Candidates

Do your antennas go up when when you watch the Presidential Candidates?

Do you look at their faces to notice if they are happy or angry, especially after someone has attacked him or her?

Do you ever see a dark spot around a candidate's mouth when he speaks? When people lie, their colors are dark and dense.

Does the sound of their voices stir your stomach?

The feelings you get are all ways to view other people's auras.

Any comments?

A Vision Brings Hope About Career Move

Dear Ruth,

It felt like a dream, but I was wide awake when I heard my grandfather say, "It's time for you to drive a six wheeler."

Was that really my grandfather, or am I making it up?

I always wanted to drive a big truck. I'm 20 years old. What do you think?

Six Wheeler Hopeful

Dear Six Wheeler Hopeful,

Intuitively I feel your vision was a true message from someone who loves you.

My hunch is that you're ready to make a career change:

• you'll enjoy the freedom of not being under the thumb of your current boss...
• and you'll like driving for a living versus working indoors...
• it's a win-win suggestion.
  

What have you got to lose? Go for it.

A frightening dream or a message...

Dear Ruth,

I dreamed I was being followed by a beautiful woman who changed into a endrogenous person. I couldn't tell if she was a woman or a man. Then s/he (?) started urinating towards the back of my leg. I realized a woman couldn't do that, but I wasn't sure whether this person was a man or woman and why this was happening. Can you tell me what this dream means? Right now I'm scared because I think the dream means someone is following me.

Fearful

Dear Fearful,

Intuitively I feel this dream represents the three aspects of yourself:

1. the beautiful woman is your spirit, close but not touching...
   
2. the endrogenous person represents how divided you feel at this time...
3. the bewilderment of how a woman can direct her urinating towards the back of your legs...

My hunch is that you are going through a major transition, similar to a midlife change. You don't know who or what you are... you're disconnected from your spirit, your female self, and you are being attacked (the urinating) by this confusion.
The only one who is stalking you is yourself and this is being caused by your confusion about what to do with the rest of your life.

Until you decide what to do, I sense this dream will come in many forms.

I recommend reading Dr. Stephen LaBerge book on Lucid Dreaming and learn how to control and manipulate the outcome of your dreams, in order to harness the healing power of your unconscious.

Mysticism vs. Metaphysics

Mysticism

Mysticism is a way of 'knowing.' It is a way of 'seeing' outside the realms of the of the ego. Mysticism holds that personal communication or union with the divine which can be achieved through experience, intuition, and/or revelation rather than 'just' through rational thought. ...

Metaphysics

Metaphysics is the study of 'first causes.' The prefix 'Meta' means beyond, higher, after or transcending.

Physics is that which deals with the 'physical' world.

Metaphysics refers to those laws which go beyond the delimitations of time and space and concerns itself with a 'higher' order of laws, or if you will, God's laws.

Jon Mundy, PhD
www.miraclesmagazine.org